One of you just bought your first house, and one of you is living in a dorm room. 

Wherever you live, take pride in the space you call home.

Keep things picked up.

Not perfect. Not spotless. Just cared for.

You’re going to spend a lot of your life there. You’re going to work hard to pay tuition, rent, or a mortgage. You might as well enjoy the place you’re paying for.

Dad and I learned that lesson early.

When Oliver was just a couple of months old, we moved into our second house. It felt like a real step forward for us. That same summer I started my business, so life became wonderfully busy all at once. We decorated the house exactly the way we wanted – country French, warm, comfortable, and filled with things we loved. It wasn’t about impressing anyone. It was about creating a home we enjoyed living in.

The hard part wasn’t decorating it.

The hard part was keeping up with it.

We honestly didn’t entertain all that much back then, but I noticed I often only cleaned when people were coming over because that’s what finally forced me to do it. Otherwise, work, family, and simple exhaustion usually won. The result was that spontaneous company often felt stressful because I never felt ready.

Ironically, I have more time now than I did then, and I still don’t always stay ahead of it. Sometimes everything is spotless. Other times, little dog-hair tumbleweeds drift across the foyer while I pretend not to notice them.

So here’s what I wish I had done differently.

When you’re planning your future budget, include money for a housekeeper.

Not because you can’t clean.

Because your time is valuable.

Because your relationships are valuable.

Because your weekends are valuable.

Because peace inside your home is valuable.

Whether you’re single, married, raising children, or simply building a career, having help isn’t something to feel guilty about. It’s one of those expenses that quietly improves everyday life.

Don’t wait until you’re overwhelmed to decide it’s worth it. Plan for it from the beginning.

Now, before either of you says it – yes, I know I don’t have a cleaning lady today. That’s true, and I’m perfectly happy with that at this stage of life. But during the years when I was raising you boys while growing a business, I think our family would have enjoyed those years even more if I had accepted a little help.

So here’s my request.

Fill your home with things you love, not things that impress other people. Take pride in where you live. Keep things picked up yourself. If you can afford it, hire out the deep cleaning. That’s the balance I wish I had found sooner.

Life is meant to be lived – not spent waiting until the house is clean enough to enjoy it.

– Mom